Santorum is for the rights of LGBT Americans, so much so he’ll sign a statement attesting to the fact.
But, um, wait a second. He might need to re-think that one. Someone might not vote for him if he supports the queers. Checks with aides.
Um, right: constituents are not for the queers: Santorum takes it all back.
F***king Ticketmaster
I’ve been a music fan my whole life, and I’m sick of goddamn Ticketmaster. I was just about to buy tickets to go see one of my favorite bands, World Party, who haven’t toured stateside since, oh, 1998, and the f***ers at Ticketmaster want $8.25 handling fee – PER TICKET!!
Oh I hate ’em, hate ’em, and have my whole concert-going life (which is now 23 years, 23 YEARS of paying their idiot handling charges).
Ultimatums
I was reading Reid Vanderbergh’s soon-to-be-published book and he mentioned how the wives of MTFs are doing reasonably well when they “were able to wrap their minds around the transition sufficiently that they did not leave the relationship, or deliver an ultimatum (“move forward with this transition and it’s over.”).”
& I was thinking, what difference is there between his example of an ultimatum:
Quote:
| move forward with this transition and it’s over |
and what i’ve said to betty:
Quote:
| i’m pretty sure i won’t be able to love a woman so transitioning may mean the end of our relationship. |
Because I honestly don’t know. Obviously tone and concern and trying to deal, yes, but ultimately, is there any difference? I’m not so sure there is.
More Thank Yous.
I suppose this is giving away the Acknowledgements page of the book, but I don’t think anyone’s planning on buying it for that, are they?
So, more thank yous to:
- Marlena, who read and commented and provided all sorts of references;
- Angus/Andrea, who provided me with useful reading and insights into linguistics issues;
- Megan, who read quite a few chapters early on for me;
- Emilia, who always managed to get me an article about three minutes after I emailed her that I needed it;
- Rhea and her wife who offered me my “writer’s cabin” when I thought I’d need it (I didn’t, after all, but it was a lovely offer);
- Michelle, who told me good stories, one of which turned out to be a very useful introduction for a specific issue I wanted to talk about;
- and Mary and Lucy, who drafted up a very cool idea for the cover that I loved (though sadly it’s not going to be used).
I think that’s everyone, for now, though of course thank you too to all of you who have emailed me or posted on the boards and inspired me to think in new ways about gender and gender roles.
It really is a relief to be done, though right behind the relief is this terrific scary feeling that I don’t get to just put it in a drawer somewhere now that I’m done: kind of the writer equivalent of stage fright, I guess. But of course it will be months till all y’all actually get to read it, so I bet stop worrying about what people are going to think of it till at least February.
Had a Little Party
I threw myself a tiny little party this past Saturday night – actually my sister hosted it, at her house – just to celebrate having finished the book. I had realized earlier in the week that there will be ongoing things to do concerning the book – copyediting to check, proofreading changes to accept or reject, blurbs to get, etc – and that if I didn’t mark the occasion, I’d hang around in a kind of limbo not getting onto other projects and finding new clients and the like.
So I threw a little party to thank the small cadre of folks who 1) helped with the book or who have generally been supportive of my writing, and 2) live around these parts. Like my sister and brother in law, for starters, and Betty (whose past couple of weeks living with a writer under deadline have *not* been the most fun she’s ever had), and others like our friend Angela, who is known to speechify about the importance of art & particularly mine; but also my friend Guy, who really is terrifically bored with how much I talk about gender but lets me prattle on anyway; Johanna, who read a chapter & whose “the girl one” story provided me with such a hugely useful way of thinking about gender in queer realtionships; my friend Doug who read the whole of the book and provided enthusiasm and good questions; Caprice, who is just nice *all the time* & of course helps with the boards; but most especially I wanted to thank Donna, who all this time has been reading my manuscript for me & providing me with an incredibly thought-provoking editing job, lawyerly re-writes, research data, objections, questions, and insights.
I had a really lovely time. I remember looking up at some point & realizing that all of my guests were people who I’d have long conversations in kitchens with at other people’s parties and events! Quite brilliant conversationalists, all of them. I overheard snatches of conversation about everything from the Pet Shop Boys to Margaret Atwood novels, from Divine’s movies to New Testament theology. I’ve been in a good mood since then, and feeling quite content with my lot in life just now.
So: thank you.
More thank yous tomorrow, to a ton of other people who were helpful but who either 1) couldn’t make it, or 2) don’t live ’round here.
True, That
The whole problem with the world is that fools and fanatics are always so certain of themselves, but wiser people so full of doubts. – Bertrand Russell
What I Don't Like
The other day on our boards someone mentioned how everyone saw her former partner as “an FTM in denial.” I don’t like that. No, more than that, I can’t stand it.
I find it especially frustrating coming from anyone trans, since trans people are so often referred to as being “really” their gender-assigned-at-birth instead of their target gender, or they’re seen as “really” homosexual, etc.
But what bothers me about it is that it’s know-it-all laced, clever, condescending. The idea of knowing someone else’s gender identity/sexual orientation (since the whole “He’s really a closet case,” is one I hear a lot, and always have) better than they do themselves is just aggrravating to me.
& I think it’s mostly mean-spirited. Not everyone is – some are sympathetic, or bemused, especially when they themselves struggled with bringing a subterranean identity to light for a long time – but I think it quickly turns to gossip and cattiness.
Just say no. The next time you hear someone do it, object. People are so quick to judge, and sometimes I think they should spend a little more time looking at their own shit than calling someone else on theirs.
Not a Feminist?
The images come from a UK feminist group (out of Cardiff, Wales,to be specific) that’s put them together to raise awareness especially among younger women who sometimes takes the rights a previous generation (or two) have earned for granted.
I’d love a t-shirt (and/or a button) that says this, too:
Study: Aeneas, Part 8
The Right Profile.
Just Go.
NYC’s Film Forum is having a Buster Keaton film festival – and they do
them well. Most of the times I’ve seen Buster on the big screen it’s been there, actually. & For some screenings there will be live music, which is cool & groovy, but if you can’t make one of those don’t let that stop you!
The only week I won’t recommend to newbies is the week of 9/18, when they’re showing College. It’s a funny movie, they all are – but it’s not the kind that makes people into fans. But all the others – Sherlock Jr., Steamboat Bill Jr. and The General (voted one of the top 100 films of all time) are all fan-makers. (They should have picked Go West, instead.)
Just go. Eight Mondays, starting with this upcoming one, August 7th.
If my raves aren’t enough to convince you, check out what this guy said about Buster’s films.
(Thanks to Caprice for the news and to Megan for the link.)