It’s World AIDS Day

from avert.org:

According to UNAIDS estimates, there are now 33.2 million people living with HIV, including 2.5 million children. During 2007 some 2.5 million people became newly infected with the virus. Around half of all people who become infected with HIV do so before they are 25 and are killed by AIDS before they are 35.

Around 95% of people with HIV/AIDS live in developing nations. But HIV today is a threat to men, women and children on all continents around the world.

Started on 1st December 1988, World AIDS Day is not just about raising money, but also about increasing awareness, fighting prejudice and improving education. World AIDS Day is important in reminding people that HIV has not gone away, and that there are many things still to be done.

Feminists Have More Fun

As it turns out, a survey has found that “having a feminist partner is linked with healthier, more romantic heterosexual relationships.”

The study, published online this week in the journal Sex Roles, relied on surveys of both college students and older adults, finding that women with egalitarian attitudes do find mates and men do find them attractive. In fact, results reveal they are having a good time, maybe a better time than the non-feminists.

And:

Among the findings:

  • College-age women who reported having feminist male partners also reported higher quality relationships that were more stable than couples involving non-feminist male partners.
  • College guys who were themselves feminists and had feminist partners reported more equality in their relationships.
  • Older women who perceived their male partners as feminists reported greater relationship health and sexual satisfaction.
  • Older men with feminist partners said they had more stable relationships and greater sexual satisfaction.

(Thanks to Lena and www.livescience.com.)

SoCo Keynote: Jenn Burleton

SOUTHERN COMFORT CONFERENCE 2007
KEYNOTE ADDRESS – SATURDAY, SEPTEMBER 15TH, 2007

One Community, One Family

by Jenn Burleton, TransActive Education & Advocacy, Portland, OR

Thank you to the organizers of this amazing conference and in particular, Cat Turner, Lola Fleck and Elaine Martin. And I must thank my longtime friend, Mariette Pathy Allen. My life has been truly blessed as a result of knowing her and sharing many adventures with her…some of which are suitable for sharing with the whole family.

When Cat Turner called back in January and invited me to come to Atlanta I was of course, very honored. I was also surprised. After all, we’d never met. I’d never attended a previous Southern Comfort Conference and I am not, in my opinion anyway, one of the gender community heavy hitters.
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Smoking = Death, & Other Gruesome Things

I saw a recent public service announcement that I can’t call anything but gruesome: it’s someone who has gotten gangrene on their feet as a result of smoking. I don’t know how; when I saw it, I was too blown away even to listen to what they were saying. Aside from the shock factor having defeated educating people, I’m really tired of being the only group being singled out for sucking because of something we do.

I mean, diabetics lose their feet if they don’t manage their diabetes, right? & A lot of people can prevent getting diabetes or can manage it if they live healthy lives. But a lot don’t, & they end up in diabetic comas or lose their feet. So where’s their public service announcement?

What about the kids of women who die of heart disease? Where are those public service announcements? Men who die of heart attacks or prostate cancer (which can often be caught early with prostate exams)? Don’t they all suck as much as smokers in not caring for their health?

I can’t smoke anywhere in public anymore, so it’s not like I’m harming anyone’s health but my own at this point. So why can’t I make a choice to neglect my health like everyone else without watching these gruesome ads about all the things that may happen to me?

Yes, I know I should stop smoking. But people should exercise & go to the doctor regularly & lose some weight, too. I just have a hard time believing that I’m the only one who is negligent about my health.

Aurora the Wounded

As much as I was hoping Aurora would stay healthy forever & never return to the vet again, she got into a kerfuffle with one of the other cats, we think; with Aeneas specifically, we think. She ended up with an abscess in her right paw which got more swollen every day until we brought her in. She was, as ever, hellfire in fur. But the vet got her revenge: to keep Aurora from licking her paw, she put her in one of those cone things.

She was not happy about the situation, and of course it took her about an hour to get it off the first time. I ended up rigging up my own device, a kind of sling made out of nylon knee-hi’s, to keep her from licking her foot, and then after a few days on the antibiotics, & with the swelling having gone down, we freed her from all of it.

Remarkably, she’s an excellent pill-taker, though as the days of antibiotics go on, she’s getting more resistant. A bonita flake or two afterwards seems to help keep her from rejecting them entirely.

It’s good to be home with all my loved ones, pill-taking crankypants cat included.

At Long Last, They Have No Decency

The Federal Mine Safety and Health Administration (MSHA) has determined that the families of the now presumed dead miners in Utah cannot have the UMWA represent them in the ongoing investigation of the case.

The real kicker is that MSHA has made this ruling despite the fact that miners & their families can choose their own representation in a case like this, but because – THE MINERS HAVE TO SIGN THE REQUEST.

This is not a punchline. This is the actual federal ruling when it comes to the families of these miners, since at the time of the cave-in, the mine was not union, so these men were not union members. Had they lived & were able to sign the request, then the UMW could represent them.

As a result, area miners are considering going union again.

Five Questions With… Marilyn Frank

Marilyn Frank has been sharing her story with wives at Fantasia Fair, IFGE and Tri-Ess seminars since 1982. She married her husband Len in 1954 and didn’t learn about the cross dressing until 1964, 10 years and 3 children later. At that time the only information available to her was Virginia Prince’s book The Transvestite and His Wife (now titled The Cross-dresser and His Wife) which she still finds to be one of the best books written.

1) First, Marilyn, I want to thank you on behalf of all the partners out there, for stepping up at a time when most of us weren’t even in high school yet. Without women like you & Peggy Rudd, the struggle to have partners’ issues recognized would be a lot more difficult. So what caused you to do the educating you did?

In the 1970’s I was a volunteer on a crisis intervention hot line in Morris County, NJ. When I became Director, I questioned some of the professionals in the group, who did not know much about cross dressing, but were able to assist me in finding people who did know. During this time we came upon Tri-Ess, and then in 1980 Len read the article in Playboy about Fantasia Fair and in 1981 we spent a few days at the Fair. I had many discussions with Ariadne Kane about the wives’ needs, and this brought Niela Miller to the Fair and that’s where my true education began. Since it had been a very lonely road not only for Len, but for me, I decided I would reach out to help others, so that’s when I started facilitating a wives group at our local Tri-Ess Chapter, which I did for for over 10 years. I also was instrumental in starting the wives’ program at the first IFGE Convention. My philosophy is that every time I help someone, I help myself. It’s true the marriage had its ups and downs where the cross dressing was concerned, but for us it was a small part of our overall marriage. We have always had good communication, enjoy many of the same things and do have a sense of humor (that helps).

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Dreger & Bailey, Again

& Now The NY Times has published an article about the whole Dreger/Bailey fiasco. It’s reasonably objective, even if the title of the article is ridiculously overblown.

Moreover, based on her own reading of federal regulations, Dr. Dreger. . . argued that the book did not qualify as scientific research. The federal definition describes “a systematic investigation, including research development, testing and evaluation.”

Dr. Bailey used the people in his book as anecdotes, not as the subjects of a systematic investigation, she reported.

Which makes it not scientific at all. Either that or someone owes me a Ph.D. for My Husband Betty.

Trans Couples: Adrien & Elena

I’m going to tell you the story of me, Adrien an FtM transman, and my partner, Elena a free-spirited, open-minded, adventurous, bi-sexual genetic woman. Y’all get ready, because some parts of it are scandalous. OK, here we go.

When Elena and I first met, I think it was late 1998, we just really hit it off, the way you do. The meeting that stood out was at the state fair, for a friend’s birthday. We were there with lots of friends and acquaintances and between us there was that magnetic energy – we were more interested in each other than anyone else and for reasons soon to be disclosed, this wasn’t entirely appropriate. Soon after that night at the fair, we met again at a party, a lesbian party. At this point on the timeline of my transition, I was just getting into the transgender vocabulary and ideas and was definitely starting to recognize myself as trans, but I was pre-everything with only some glimmerings that chest surgery might be something feasible for me. So, I was still living at home in the bosom of the lesbian community, but starting to scratch the itch that would bring my time there to its end. At present, we still have many gay and lesbian friends, but some have dropped out of our lives as well. Since the beginning of our relationship, we always found that we felt more aligned with our straight couple friends and I definitely do not call myself a lesbian any more. Elena’s relationship and sexual history includes men and women but at the time we met, she was identified as lesbian and had a female partner. But back to the story…

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