I think this is my favorite National Coming Out Day idea I’ve seen so far. So yeah, Cleveland does rock.
Congratulations, Shannon Minter!
I just heard the news that Shannon Minter won a Ford Foundation award – specifically a ‘Leaders for a Changing World’ award.
A huge congratulations – and a thank you – to Mr. Minter and his ongoing work.
(You can read more about Minter and the award on the boards.)
The Beauty Myth, & Your Wife
I got involved in an altercation in another group I’m in (what a surprise, right?) when I was trying to explain why partners might be put off by yet another make-up seminar.
But it was a CD, ultimately, who explained it best, and I decided to post what she had to say, here:
Keep this in mind. Ponder these fantastically offensive ideas.
– The most important thing about a woman is her appearance. That trumps intelligence, character, spirit, etc.
– Her appearance is not appropriate as-is. She must buy stuff and spent large amounts of time using it. If she does not, she should be ashamed. If she does, well, she’s still not OK. After all, there’s always a better airbrushed model on every billboard.
Horrible, evil claims? Things that nobody in the trans community would be scummy enough to believe? Definitely. And yet pretty much every woman alive has been told these things – implicitly or explicitly. The process of being a mature woman includes learning to rebel against these evil ideas. Defending her spirit against this kind of garbage is CRUCIAL.
So, when you accidentally trigger those defenses by saying something that maybe shouldn’t be interpreted as promoting these evil attitudes – but, then again, understandably could be – CUT HER SOME SLACK. Don’t split hairs of wording with her and tell her she had no business perceiving offense. Tell her you’re on her side, and leave it at that.
Are her defenses too touchy? Her very soul depends on those defenses. Better she defend herself vigorously, and occasionally unnecessarily, than to give the garbage any chance for a toehold in her.
At the same time, I can see why you’re tempted to answer, “Don’t be offended!” Because we’d be ashamed to hold such attitudes, and we don’t like the thought that we came across as believing that even for a moment. But the better way to bolster womankind is not to get bogged down arguing in who should or shouldn’t have been offended, but all to affirm together that allthe synthetic trappings of femininity are for totally voluntary use as we each please.
– Jade Catherine, http://alum.mit.edu/www/rebar
Five Questions With… Dallas Denny
Dallas Denny, M.A., is founder and was for ten years Executive Director of the American Educational Gender Information Service, Inc. (AEGIS), a national clearinghouse on transsexual and transgender issues. She is currently on the board of Gender Education & Advocacy, Inc., AEGIS’ successor organization, which lives at www.gender.org. She is Director of Fantasia Fair and editor of Transgender Tapestry magazine and was editor and publisher of the late Chrysalis: The Journal of Transgressive Gender Identities. Dallas is a prolific writer with hundreds of articles and three books to her credit. She recently decided to retire her license to practice psychology in Tennessee, since she seems to have found a permanent home in Pine Lake, Georgia, pop. 650, the world’s smallest municipality with a transgender nondiscrimination ordinance.
1) You’ve been a trans educator/activist for a long time now: what do you see as the biggest development in terms of trans politics since you’ve been doing this?
When I began my activism in 1989, the community was almost entirely about education– outreach to the general public and information to other transpeople. There wasn’t much information available, and much of that wasn’t very good or was outdated– and even the bad information could be almost impossible to find. The rapid growth of the community in the 1990s and especially the explosion of the internet made information much easier to find.
Somewhere around 1993, the community had reached a point at which political activism had become possible. Of course, some of us had always been doing that, but it hadn’t been a prime focus of the community, and what had been done had been sporadic and short-lived, often was done by a single individual or a small group, and tended to happen in places like San Francisco and New York City. This activism did give us some political gains– most notably in Minnesota, which adopted state-wide protections as early as, I believe, the early 1970s, but around 1993 there was a growing political consciousness in the community, and things just began to take off.
I can identify some important events of the 1990s– when Nancy Burkholder, a post-op transsexual woman, was kicked out of the Michigan Womyn’s conference, when people began to come together in Texas at Phyllis Randolph Frye’s ICTLEP law conference, when the March on Washington turned out to be non-transinclusive, when a bunch of us got together to form GenderPac (an organization which was promptly hijacked by the Executive Director)– but there were two biggies, in my opinion. The first was the first transgender lobbying, which was done by Phyllis Frye and Jane Fee. They couldn’t believe they had actually done it, then wondered why they hadn’t done it before. When HRCF (as it was then called) promptly went behind their backs and removed the transgender inclusions Phyllis and Jane had convinced lawmakers to put into the Employment Nondiscrimination Act, there was a sense of outrage. The news broke when Sarah DePalma got an e-mail.at the law conference. It happened to be the only ICTLEP I attended. We had a coule of strategy sessions and went back home and the next week did actions at at least six Pride events, including Atlanta, which I coordinated. You should have seen the jaws drop when I handed leaflets to the folks at the HRCF booth. The organization has, of course, done a complete turnaround since then, or so we hope.
The other big event was the muder of Brandon Teena; in the aftermath, we began to get media coverage that concentrated on our political issues and not just our individual psychologies or transition histories.
After that, things just exploded. Today many of us– as many as one in three– have some sort of legal protections– anti-discrimination, hate crimes, or both. My little town of Pine Lake, Georgia, population 650, even has trans protections– and I didn’t even have to ask for them. They were already in place when I moved here in the late 1990s.
Continue reading “Five Questions With… Dallas Denny”
National Coming Out Day
October 11th is National Coming Out Day, and I wanted to provide some resources for some of you who might have someone to come out to – a wife, girlfriend, parent, child, friend, or peer.
- Here’s a short piece by Abigail Garner, the author of Families Like Mine.
- Lambda’s tips for coming out are brief but helpful.
- HRC has a special section of their Coming Out Project pages called Coming Out as Transgender.
- The APA has a “Just the Facts” sheet that’s more geared toward the GL, but still has a lot of useful information on reparative therapy (for those of you who might come out to more Christian friends & family).
- And there’s the transgender division of P-FLAG, T-NET, which has a bunch of useful information for the family of transpeople.
Good luck!
Amnesty International Report on Treatment of LGBT Americans by Law Enforcement
Amnesty International’s report, Stonewalled: Police abuse and misconduct against lesbian, gay, bisexual and transgender people in the U.S., is not good news at all.
The reports on the NYPD alone make me sad, and a little more scared. You shouldn’t have to feel like you’re relying on luck to be treated even moderately well by the police, but from what this report says, that is the case.
So what do we do about this? I’d be happy to conduct transgender-sensitivity training for the NYPD, if anyone knows anyone who could make that happen.
Passing
I have a lot of thoughts about our family reunion trip to Colorado, but I’ve been at least meaning to point out the awfully creepy feeling I had passing for a “straight” couple while we were there. Since Betty’s parents do not know their son is any gender but male, she went as “he” for the five days we were visiting.
I’d like to be able to have a time machine right now, and do the whole trip again with Betty as her female self, and us as a queer/lesbian couple, and so really be able to compare the difference. But I can’t, so I’ll theorize about what I think might have been different – and how – later this week, before it’s 5am and all my braincells are shot.
Marlene
Penny posted a great photo of Marlene Dietrich in suit-and-tie on the boards, & I just decided she was too fantastic not to put one up here.
Did she rock or what?!
We're Back
Betty and I are back from our various travels – all of which were wonderful – and now figuring out life with three cats.
And catching up on email.
I’ll post more about our recent travels as soon as I’m not falling asleep on my keyboard.
Not a Record
(Oh, some of you are old enough to know what a record is, right?)
Happy Friday. We’re in Denver, and will be back lickety-split.