“You know who’s not ‘all Catholics now’? All Catholics now. 98% of Catholic women have used birth control and the other 2% are the ones always trying to get the softball team started.”

Speaking of: if the real thing is making birth control free, I highly recommend homosexuality, but I’m pretty sure Santorum won’t get behind that.

Helen Boyd

is the author of My Husband Betty and She's Not the Man I Married.

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