Today, while getting my hair cut, I mentioned to my newest hairdresser that my partner is transgendered.

And he asked how long he’s been on T.

I’ve noticed that I am more consistently clocked as the lesbian partner of an FTM than the right way ’round.

Helen Boyd

is the author of My Husband Betty and She's Not the Man I Married.


  1. You’re not alone. At least till I mention the Fab4, then I get to chuckle at the confused expressions. Always a plus.

  2. That’s funny!

    My sweetie and I seem to be perceived as friends. I figure that’s because we don’t look like what people expect lesbians to look like.

  3. Amazing what people assume, isn’t it? There are hierarchies within hierarchies when really the right response is “tell me about your partner”More will be revealed(its complex even beyond the fact that I’m in a 26 year marriage), but I may be falling for another trans woman, something I swore wouldn’t happen; I relate a lot.
    To echo Veronique, I think the trans MTF lesbian experience is a lot different….

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