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Back in the NY Groove (While Still in WI)

It thrills me to no end that I am going to a retreat this weekend with a bunch of students from NYC. Why? Because I won’t have to talk so slow and constantly regulate my enthusiasm and keep myself from interrupting. I won’t have to count to three when someone is done speaking just to make sure I’m not interjecting too quickly. I’m not particularly good at doing those things, mind you: I’m still from New York and have all the speech patterns Deborah Tannen talks about in this article.

A Californian who visited New York once told me he’d found New Yorkers unfriendly when he’d tried to make casual conversation. I asked what he made conversation about. Well, for example, how nice the weather was. Of course! No New Yorker would start talking to a stranger about the weather—unless it was really bad. We find it most appropriate to make comments to strangers when there’s something to complain about—“Why don’t they do something about this garbage!” “Ever since they changed the schedules, you can’t get a bus!” Complaining gives us a sense of togetherness in adversity. The angry edge is aimed at the impersonal “they” who are always doing things wrong. The person is thus welcomed into a warm little group. Since Californians don’t pick up this distinction between “us” and “them,” they are put off by the hostility, which they feel could be turned on them at any moment.

But around other New Yorkers I can fucking relax and expect people to be a little louder, a little more dramatic, to clip my sentences and know, when I clip theirs, that I am only showing enthusiasm. Continue reading “Back in the NY Groove (While Still in WI)”

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Bonsoir, Mademoiselle

France has officially dropped Mademoiselle from the lexicon, as there is no equivalent for young men. Abbreviated Mlle., the term was often used to imply a woman’s unmarried state; symbolically, her virginal or simply youthful state.

But there is no equivalent for men, as “monsieur” is used for married & unmarried (& we assume, virginal and sexually experienced) men.

Long overdue, in my opinion, but it’s great to see this change codified.

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Mercedes Allen on the “Transgender” Debate

What a remarkable essay on the whole recent “don’t call me transgender” debate by the one & only Mercedes Allen. Historically accurate, intentionally personal, coherently political, and — just WOW. Great stuff. Of course I can’t say I agree entirely, but her impulse to take this cry seriously is the same as mine.

I have found myself using the term “traditional transsexuals” – which I love because the idea seems oxymoronic on first glance to many people – because there is a certain type of transsexual person who really doesn’t have much in common with the larger trans community. Jamison Green calls them the “mow the lawn” transsexual people – the people who come to a meeting to find out what to do & how to do it, who then do it, & then they go home & mow the lawn. Transition as a medical, legal and social pathway is effectively curative: I had the wrong body, and now I don’t, & let’s all move on with our lives. Ideally, for some people, this is exactly the solution, and I have known far too many trans people for whom this is the only answer that makes any sense. They are not necessarily stealth or closeted; they are not ashamed of their transness, and they are open about it with a very select group of people – close friends, children, partners – but otherwise are not. That is, they tell people on a need to know basis, and most people need to know someone is trans about as much as anyone needs to know if someone has had any other medical procedure.

Because people often re-gender people who are trans once they find out they are trans. I’ve seen it happen too many times.

That said, many of the things needed by transgender people – the umbrella – are also needed by “traditional transsexual” people while they’re transitioning: Legal & safe use of public bathrooms, access to hormones, non-discrimination legislation, etc. I worry more about trans people who live lives in which people don’t know they’re trans far more than I worry about those who are out — exactly because you really don’t know how someone will react when they don’t know, and many will feel betrayed — even if and when they wouldn’t otherwise have a problem with someone being trans. It sucks, but it’s true. It’s not fair, but it’s true.

The one thing I can say about the transgender communities: stuff changes. Roll with it. It’s the most exciting thing about this social movement.

 

 

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Gender Neutral Pronouns

Thanks to Sarah Wagner (go partners!), who is currently helping plan the Trans Ohio conference, here are some resources on gender neutral pronouns.

First, a fact sheet – with grammatically correct chart – of how to use the various gender neutral pronouns, including possessives and pronunciation. I’d love it if someone wanted to write a sample sentence so that the syntax of them could be demonstrated.
Second, a list of rules to practice good manners with other people’s pronouns and genders.

The only other thing I would point out is that all of us have pronoun preferences. Every single one of us, so please don’t get all “ugh, trans people” about it unless you’re a woman who doesn’t mind being called “he” or “sirred” when out to dinner.

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Writing About Bodies

Dean Spade recently wrote a short piece about how we might use language to de-gender bodies. It’s smart and concise – just as you’d expect from Dean Spade.

About Purportedly Gendered Body Parts

I have been thinking about how much I would like it if people, especially health practitioners, exercise instructors and others who talk about bodies a lot, would adjust their language about body parts heavily associated with gender norms. Lots of people who identify as feminists and allies to trans people still use terms like “female-bodied,” “male body parts,” “bio-boy,”and “biologically female.” Even in spaces where people have gained some basic skills around respecting pronoun preferences, suggesting an increasing desire to support gender self determination and release certain expectations related to gender norms, I still hear language used that asserts a belief in constructions of “biological gender.” From my understanding, a central endeavor of feminist, queer, and trans activists has been to dismantle the cultural ideologies, social and legal norms that say that certain body parts determine gender identity and gendered social characteristics and roles. We’ve fought against the idea that the presence of uteruses or ovaries or penises should be understood to determine such things as people’s intelligence, proper parental roles, proper physical appearance, proper gender identity, proper labor roles, proper sexual partners and activities, and capacity to make decisions. We’ve opposed medical and scientific assertions that affirm the purported health of traditional gender roles and activities and pathologize bodies that defy those norms. Continue reading “Writing About Bodies”

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Survey on Trans Language: 10 Years Later

Jamison Green, Jason Cromwell & Dallas Denny did a survey on trans terminology 10 years ago to try to educate people who were writing about trans issues. It’s a whole decade later, & they thought it needed an update, so they’ve created a survey for those of us in the community to weigh in what terminology doesn’t suck and what does. Here’s their letter:

Greetings!

Ten years ago, we conducted a short survey of our community’s reactions to the use of descriptive terminology in the professional literature of gender identity issues. Basically, we were interested in reforming the literature so it could speak respectfully about transsexual and transgender persons. To do that, we wanted to find out which terms transsexual and transgender people liked, and which they didn’t like. The results of our study were reported at the 2001 scientific symposium of the Harry Benjamin International Gender Dysphoria Association (HBIGDA), and had an immediate impact on the hundreds of medical and social scientists who were present.

A lot has changed since 2001, and we thought it would be interesting to re-open the survey, collect new data, compare the results 10 years later with the original results, and present our analysis at the 2011 scientific symposium of the World Professional Association for Transgender Health (formerly HBIGDA) this September.

We are asking community members to rate and give us their opinions of certain terms which have been used in the literature, and some of the terms put forth by the community itself, so we can communicate the community’s opinions to the members of WPATH and (we hope) more widely in a subsequent academic publication.

There are no physical or psychological risks associated with responding to this survey, and there are no age restrictions for respondents, though we caution participants that some terms offered for your evaluation may be offensive to you or other individuals. The survey has only 8 questions (though most questions have many options to choose from) and should take less than 20 minutes to complete. Please complete it all in one sitting – if you exit the survey before you complete it, your answers will not be saved. The survey is scheduled to close June 28, 2011, so please respond soon!

If you are interested in receiving a copy of the paper which will eventually come from this, you will be given an email address at the end of the survey so you can contact the researchers separate from your responses to this survey. Any communication you initiate with us will not be associated with your survey answers, and no identifying information will be retained. We will treat your email address as confidential and will use it only for distribution of the paper to you. Your answers to the survey also will be treated confidentially, and no data reported in our analysis will be traceable to you.

Here’s the link to the survey:

https://www.surveymonkey.com/s/8RGBH25

Thank you VERY MUCH for participating in this survey and helping us with our research!!

With Gratitude,
Jamison Green, Jason Cromwell, & Dallas Denny

Let them know what you think. The paper will be published this fall.

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Charting Identities

via Google Labs:

Apparently, transsexuals and transvestites are waning, and transgender is ascendant. Not that we didn’t know that, but there it is in red green and blue.

I like the way dyke has remained a subcultural word (consistently small percentages over time), while I assume queer went from being used in the “odd or weird” way to the current meaning, dipping in the late 80s/early 90s.

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How the Other Half Lives

My friend Lynne alerted me to a post about the uselessness of women. I wish I could say it surprised me, even a little, but essentialism is essentialism is essentialism, whether that’s expressed in “women should rule the world” attitudes or “women are useless” attitudes. To me: same coin, different sides.

What amazed me even more was this post on the same blog about terminology in this “manosphere.” I hate to say it, but the stuff is so pathetic I just feel sorry for them in their hateful little world. Okay, not really, but I can’t even imagine what it’s like to live in that tiny a brain.