RIP Helen Gurley Brown

You don’t have to like Cosmo to have admired Helen Gurley Brown. You only have to appreciate how rare her voice was at the time it appeared: Sex and the Single Girl came out a year before The Feminine Mystique.

And she was, of course, a pro-sex woman’s voice which in the 1960s and 1970s was not very acceptable in mainstream feminism.

RIP, Ms. Brown. You did good.

Jiggety Jig

Starting the drive home tomorrow, and know I’m going to cry for the first hour we’re driving away. I’ve had an absolutely amazing time, managed to run into one person completely accidentally whom I’d lost touch with, and saw so many others who have renewed my love for humankind.

Thank you, New York. You may not be the same city I’ve always loved, but you’re still goddamned amazing, for the sights, but mostly for the people in it.

Milwaukee

I’m heart-broken to hear this news. Milwaukee, for the record, is a very cool little city, & the county is progressive. My heart is with the county’s residents, many of whom are no doubt horrified by this expression of hate in their community, but especially with the loved ones of those murdered, including the police officer’s family, and all of the people who will live in more fear because of this shooting.

And honestly? White people need fucking mental help in this country. Don’t tell me it’s not all white people. Of course it isn’t. But the consistency of race of the people who commit these horrible acts of slaughter – of innocents – is becoming pretty apparent. (My favorite website for good anti-racist ideas is Abagond. Go check it out.)

Oak Creek is a city near Milwaukee, by the way, & part of the same county (Milwaukee County), but is considered part of the the larger metropolitan Milwaukee area.

Kiki

This Scissor Sisters video is making the rounds & I’m amused as now Urban Dictionary is filled with people defining kiki as a small private party in someone’s apartment, & that is definitely not the way it’s been used (historically) in queer communities.

“Kiki” was used to describe lesbians who were not butch or femme when butch-femme was expected, back in the 50s, and it was also used to describe someone who had been “flipped” – that is, a butch who made another butch her femme, sexually speaking, and it was the “flipped” butch who was referred to as a kiki. So the shorthand often just meant someone who didn’t accept a distinct sexual role, or who played both sides; in lesbian communities of color, it’s often referred to women who might just be described as bi. It wasn’t a compliment or even neutral but was (at the very least) a snide label that commented on someone else’s “confusion” or “indecision”.

(& Much thanks to Jacob & Drew for the heads up.)