What a sad thing to hear: Erica Andrews, who was still in her early 40s, died of a lung infection a week ago now. She was not, as the articles make her out to be, a “drag queen” or “female illusionist” – or at least not those things only – she lived as a woman 24/7 and talked specifically about being a transsexual woman. They did get the “one of the best” part right, at least.
There’s a nice video tribute here, and here’s a clip of her on Tyra. She did one hell of a Joan Crawford, too.
Well, we’re off: for a week in NYC, the GLAAD Media Awards, visit with family, friends, and the teeming masses.
I’ve missed every goddamn one of them, doncha know.
(I will probably Tweet more than Facebook while I’m away. Honestly, the longer I’m off Facebook, the happier I am.)
Wow, this is cool news. Howard University’s Law School has filed an amicus brief in support of same sex marriage. (An amicus brief is filed by an amicus curiae, or “someone who is not a party to a case who offers information that bears on the case but that has not been solicited by any of the parties to assist a court. . . a way to introduce concerns ensuring that the possibly broad legal effects of a court decision will not depend solely on the parties directly involved in the case.)
from the Summary of Argument:
Today, public debate over interracial unions ha sgenerally died since this Court’s Loving v. Virginia decision in 1967 such that we are now long past the time when anyone would seriously claim that race-based marriage equality threatens the moral fabric of our civilization, is contrary to nature, or is harmful to children. Yet these arguments, however discredited, have not disappeared altogether.Instead, they have been recycled to oppose same-sex marriage.This brief demonstrates that there is nothing new about the arguments marshaled to oppose same-sex marriage; the very same arguments – eventually categorically rejected in Loving v.Virginia — were assembled in opposition to interracial marriage. As a society, we have rightfully come to embrace full human dignity for interracial couples and individuals. We should do no less for same-sex couples.
To which I can only reply: YES. This is especially cool, coming as it does, from an historically black university.
SpaWorld, a Fairfax, VA spa openly denies trans and queer clientele. I have always been a little amazed by people who will not even accept our money – I mean, that’s real hate.
The worst part? It’s their policy, not an accident or an overzealous homophobic employee, AND it’s perfectly legal.
“It is our policy to not accept any kinds of abnormal sexual oriented customers to our facility such as homosexuals, or transgender(s).”
“Also, for the safety and the comfort of young children at Spa World, we strongly forbid any abnormal sexual behaviors and orientation in our facility. Despite the controversial issue of homosexuality and transgender, it is our policy to not accept them.”
Wow. I assume there is no actual policy against child molesters, however.
Well isn’t this cool? The Victory Fund just endorsed Mel Wymore, a trans candidate running for NYC City Council on the Upper West Side.
(god love the Upper West Side, ha. My favorite story about it is when George Bush Jr. was touring the devastation of 9/11, and he and Giuliani were sharing a ride up Riverside Drive, and Giuliani turned to Bush while waving his hand at the numerous beautiful apartment buildings up there and said, “No one up here voted for you.” For those not from NYC – it’s where a lot of Columbia and CCNY professors live, along with many other overeducated liberals. It’s the kind of place you can get into a conversation about Pynchon while buying bagels and three other people in line join in just to clarify some obscure point about Lot 49.)
Anyway: cool a man who happens to be trans is running, and cool that Victory Fund endorsed him.
If you can donate – or vote for him – please do.
Via FORGE and Loree Cook-Daniels:
The recently-released National Intimate Partner and Sexual Violence Survey, 2010 Findings on Victimization by Sexual Orientation, held many surprises, not the least of which was that bisexual men and women are, overall, the most at risk. Here are some of those highlights, ordered to highlight highest rates:
Lifetime prevalence of rape (because of their definition of “rape,”
numbers were too small to report for gay and bi men, although heterosexual men reported a rate of 0.7%):
Bisexual women — 46.1%
Heterosexual women — 17.4%
Lesbian women — 13.1%
Lifetime prevalence of sexual violence other than rape:
Bisexual women — 74.9%
Bisexual men — 47.4%
Lesbians — 46.4%
Heterosexual women — 43.3%
Gay men — 40.2%
Heterosexual men — 20.8%
Lifetime prevalence of rape, physical violence, and/or stalking by an intimate partner:
Bisexual women — 61.1%
Lesbians — 43.8%
Bisexual men — 37.3%
Heterosexual women — 35.0%
Heterosexual men — 29.0%
Gay men — 26.0%
The full report (PDF) is available at
http://www.cdc.gov/ViolencePrevention/pdf/NISVS_SOfindings.pdf
Tonight is Lawrence’s Drag Show, put on by (mostly) LGBTQIAA students, and I think it’s the 4th (5th?) one I’ve been here for. I haven’t missed one.
I get to go whether or not I drag anyone with me, and every year I’m blown away – first, because I usually get to hear some song I have never heard before that they all know, and so I get to remind myself that I am ancient. That’s honestly a great reminder to someone who teaches.
Almost every year there is some student who does drag (in public, at least) for the very first time, and that is always remarkable. I don’t even personally know what that’s like as someone who would never step onto a stage to perform anything but a lecture, but I do know that I have held a lot of first-time-out crossdressers by the elbow to make sure they don’t just faint. For some, of course, it’s just fun, and they’re naturally extroverted, theatrical types. One former student is out in San Francisco doing drag as I type, no doubt.
But I am pleased it seems to have become an institution here, now, & I hope I’ve had at least some small part in making it that.
I so love that this guy wrote to the AP to let them know that he & his husband use the term “husband” with each other. Apparently the AP is supposed to not use the terms for same sex couples unless those people use it themselves.
So he went on record and wrote to the AP to let them know that in his case, and in his husband’s case, they should go ahead and use “husband”.
I understand that the AP will only refer to my lawfully wedded husband, Michael Gallagher, as my “husband” if you are aware that we have regularly used those terms.
As this determination is being made on a case-by-case basis, I wanted to let you know, for your records, that we use these terms.
You can write to them to: Tom Kent, the standards editor, tkent@ap.org, [and] David Minthorn, AP stylebook editor, dminthorn@ap.org.
I really do want to write to them but I think trying to explain that we’ve gone from husband & wife to wives to sometimes just “legal spouse” – because the legally married part often needs to be underlined – might just throw the AP if they’re still pussyfooting around couples who are, and stay, the same legal gender.
And we in the trans community wonder why journalists get it wrong so often.
Here’s some great news for the Midwest: a gender identity clinic that will treat children:
The clinic, which is up and running but has yet to officially launch, is the first of its kind in the city and one of few resources for gender-variant kids younger than 13. Through the clinic, children dealing with gender identity issues will have access to everything from endocrinology to psychology.
“As a unit, the family is not always ready to embrace terms like ‘LGBT’ or ‘transgender,’” said Dr. Rob Garofalo, director of the Center. “I think coming to Lurie allows people to come to a place where services are hopefully increasingly culturally competent, without threatening the developmental trajectory that these families have to go through.”
Garofalo created the clinic out of a patchwork of specialists already working within Lurie, a move that both has both staffed the clinic and furthered understanding about transgender lives within Lurie, he said. The Center will also employ a psychologist and a social worker.
In past years, Chicago families with transgender kids often found medical and mental health services piecemeal. While many of the city’s LGBT organizations offer youth services, most of those services are designed for kids ages 13 and older.
Some families flew to Boston Children’s Hospital or Children’s Hospital Los Angeles, which both have gender clinics for children. But for families without the time or means to travel, finding specialists that understood gender issues and kids presented a serious challenge.
So very, very cool. The world IS changing.
I kinda love this one: me and my wife listening intently all fancied up.
Tomorrow I’ll be at the Fair Wisconsin Education Fund’s conference; tonight, at Fair Wisconsin’s Gala Celebration, where Zach Wahls will be speaking and Tammy Baldwin will be in attendance.
I’m doing a workshop on gender identity and the LGBTQ, and there are tons more useful and interesting workshops and panels. You can check out the whole conference book here.
It’s not too late to register or buy a ticket to the gala dinner, so get on it!
Hi all! It’s rare I do this, but I’ve just been invited to go to the GLAAD Media Awards Banquet, but I can’t afford the ticket or the travel!
If there is someone out there who might make a donation to GLAAD anyway, you can buy my $500 ticket and get the tax deduction. I would be happy to consider some kind of barter in exchange, too.
Or, the many of you out there can help fund with just a small donation. If you need an email address, helenboyd@myhusbandbetty.com should work.
Pretty please? (If you can’t, feel free to pass this on to someone who might and can, please.)
Next Saturday, Fair Wisconsin’s Education Fund will be holding a Gala to celebrate the year’s victories and leadership, and yes, Tammy Baldwin will be in attendance!
Tickets are $125 a person, and the keynote speaker will be none other than Zach Wahls. I will be there, of course.
I will also be doing a workshop at Fair Wisconsin’s Leadership Conference as well, which is a very cool event – a great place to learn about a vast array of issues facing LGBTQ people. There are scholarships available for students – and it’s only $35 for students.
I’ve written about him before (& even about the Sting connection) but just discovered the film made about him – with John Hurt playing Crisp – is available to see on Logo for free!
So this is what’s going on in Appleton and the surrounding Fox Valley: I did one of the info sessions for the initial CHAT Plunge that’s mentioned in the article and was at the breakfast on Wednesday – where my wife spoke, very briefly, about supporting this campaign.
I went to a breakfast to kick off a campaign here in the Fox Valley yesterday: the idea is to make sure LGBTQ people know they’re welcome. There have been too many suicides of these kids over the past few years just in this area, & I sat at the same table with one of the moms who lost her son yesterday.
You just don’t know what to say. There really isn’t anything to say. You keep doing, instead, in hopes that no other mom ever has to go through that.
So when I saw this piece by Rachel Maddow, about how PFLAG parents at pride parades *always* make her cry, I felt some kind of relief: me too. Who knows why. Maybe you can tell on some of their faces that it’s not what they’ve chosen. Or that it’s still hard for them. Or that they’re not convinced gayness isn’t a sin. Who knows? But they’re there, and they’re proud of their love.
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Which is, yeah: more of what the world needs.
(This clip is also a nice piece of gay history, & so worth watching. Obama’s retelling of Morty’s arrest at the Stonewall is priceless, too.)
You’ve probably seen it already, but Jodie Foster burned the house down last night at the Golden Globes by coming out. She had, really, already, back in 2007, and before that – well, anyone who cared has known for a long, long while.
But she was under tremendous pressure to come out for a very long time. She’s been mocked, criticized, and accused of being self-hating because she didn’t come out in a big public way. But she has been out to her friends and family – and, as I said, everyone else pretty much knew too. She’s been raising two children with her (now former) partner for the past two decades.
And while this coming out has also been criticized – some people are never happy – I thought she was fucking amazing & actually broke the goddamn rules and told everyone to go fuck themselves. & She did it totally seriously, without conceding anything emotionally. Unbelievable strength is what I saw, wrapped in barbs and spoken through pounds of fear.
While people concede the whole “but she’s an actor, she doesn’t get a private life” in some conjunction with the whole Hinckley Jr. trauma – I can’t imagine she experienced it as anything less than that – I’ve chosen a pretty non-private life too, and either you get to do what you want to do or you don’t. & To do some things, you don’t get to be private. So is that really a choice? I guess. But that doesn’t make it easier, to be honest.
The rage in her speech I understand entirely. Her friendship with Mel Gibson is utterly baffling – except for this: she probably understands better than most what it’s like to be so publicly & thoroughly hated for being angry and unpopular. I’ve rewatched this clip about half a dozen times, & I am still struck by the awesome amount of gratitude she expresses – that is in her voice, and her face, and her body – and that barely keeps in check the disgust and frustration with feeling forced to say something publicly.
Anyway, there was just something about this that struck a nerve – something that resonated with what Iggy Pop had to say about turning 50, something that I am beginning to understand deep in my bone marrow. Something in me has changed, too, hardened with anger, exhausted with pettiness while simultaneously overwhelmed by how deeply I can still feel. I am pretty sure this is not something I would have understood when I was younger or at a different time in my life, but I do now.
Thank you, Ms. Foster, for being unpleasant, hard as nails, and inimitably gracious and full of as much integrity as you could be.
PFLAG’s lovely tribute. I don’t think it’s hard to imagine that. Every day that is still difficult for parents to say. She was a good soul and a good parent then and now.
We should all hope to achieve the legacy of love she gave us.
In the midst of all this bad news – the NRA’s ongoing thick-headedness, Iowa’s full speed reversal into 1953 – there is some good news out of the state of Wisconsin: namely, that Wisconsin’s domestic partnership registry has been upheld as constitutional by a state appeals court.
This is especially good news as Wisconsin has a superDOMA in place, which not only bans same sex marriage but bans anything like marriage for same sex couples.
Here’s the basic gist:
Democratic lawmakers created the registry in 2009. Same-sex couples who join it are afforded a host of legal rights, including the right to visit each other in hospitals and make end-of-life decisions for one another. About 1,800 couples were on the registry at the end of 2011, according to the latest data from the state Department of Health Services.
Members of the conservative group Wisconsin Family Action filed a lawsuit in 2010 alleging the registry bestowed a legal status substantially similar to marriage to same-sex couples. The group argued that violates the Wisconsin Constitution’s ban on gay marriage.
Republican Attorney General J.B. Van Hollen refused to defend the registry, declaring it was clearly unconstitutional. Former Gov. Jim Doyle, a Democrat, appointed private attorneys to defend it, but Republican Gov. Scott Walker fired them after he took office in 2011 because he, too, believed the registry was unconstitutional.
Fair Wisconsin, the state’s largest gay rights group, stepped into the case to defend the registry. Dane County Circuit Judge Daniel Moeser ruled last summer that the registry was constitutional, finding it conveys a status that’s not identical or substantially similar to marriage.
Which means, in a nutshell, that right now is a damn good time to donate to Fair Wisconsin and thank them for their efforts on behalf of some very basic rights of same sex couples.
