Gossip & Calumny*

Okay, I’m definitely upset.
As of a few months ago, Betty & I both realized that she is struggling with issues of TGness, basically questioning if she is TS. She is decreasingly unhappy returning to guy mode, and started to express serious interest in transitioning (whether that would involve hormones, surgeries, or just social transition, we hadn’t a clue.)
So, I recently joined a list for partners of trans people – partners I could talk to who were in similar situations, to figure out what people were doing about job/family/sex, etc.
Today I heard from an old friend in the gender community that she has heard on another list that Betty is transitioning.
I know there are people out there who would have my head on a plate for having publicly & emphatically criticized Tri-Ess for being both trans- and homophobic in my book. But despite that, I didn’t expect for us to be gossiped about this way: surely anyone in the gender community knows how hard this is without me having to watch my back all the time!
I’m feeling like I have no choice but to keep my mouth shut on our own issues, and that hurts. Whoever it is out there that is doing this – spreading rumors to somehow squelch my credibility as the partner of a CD/TG – is a nasty piece of work. I’ll figure out where the leak is, eventually – of that there is no doubt.
Betty & I have always been honest about our struggles, and to realize this is the way one person has responded to my attempt to educate the greater population – and help people who are just finding out – really gets on my case.
For the record, Betty is not currently transitioning.
* cal-um-ny ( P ) Pronunciation Key (klm-n)
n. pl. cal-um-nies

1. A false statement maliciously made to injure another’s reputation.
2. The utterance of maliciously false statements; slander.